yesterday quarrel. although it is over small ting but it did have huge impact on me.
feel scare at night, dun reali dare to switch off the light to sleep coz i start imagining things after watchin the movie. tinkin that i will feel better after hearing his sweet and warm voice, i call him and yet, i end up feeling worst.
call him repeatly. either he hang up or he din answer. i know he sleeping. BUThe say that if i am scare or need him, i can call him anytime and he promise me he will be there.but he did not honour his promise.
feel more panick and scare when he din answer the phone. tears already swelling up in my eyes.and the first ting he said when he FINALLY answer the phone is '' wad e problem?'' in a rude manner. i get angry of coz...this is NOT the ting i wanna hear.
so we end up quarrelling.. this is not e first time he not there when i need him at night. another day when i having stomachache, i call him even though we still on cold war earlier. i expect him to put all our quarrels aside and show care and concern for me. BUT he did not. he still throw temper. So i ended up, alone at home, in pain.
the nex day, he sick and yet i can put all these aside and care for him. i can do tt. why cant he? so yesterday, i ended up, sleepin wif light on for few hrs, cover myself wif blanket. i still feelin scare........but he did nuting.
so dis time round, i not gonna forgive him tt easily. he always wake up e nex day, saying sweet tings so tt i will forgive him. but dis time, NO. i hurt by you. U HEAR ME? feel like i cant rely on u all of a sudden. u can give me gifts to make me happy. but dis is not wad i wanted. yesh, im happy coz u buy gift for me. but wad i needed most is care, concern and throwing less temper.......
Mango
